Day 18: Ego – The Single Woman’s Diary

Ego. When I hear a 29 year old complain about how respect must be given automatically due to age and thus (due to the same age factor) the person can do as they wish, – as a 36 year old I literally can’t stop shaking my head as I see an attention seeking child throwing a tantrum when no one allows that extra ice-cream topping; and I am sure a 55 year old will think of both of us as inexperienced morons wanting to look cool, and a 70 year old would call out on us as – “adolescents needing to be disciplined”!

Ego. A healthy dose of it allows us to prosper whereas an unhealthy dose makes us so insecure in our skin that we constantly need to provoke and get reaction to feel alive. Where does this come from? Come on, accept it, most people in their 20s are somehow convinced that every person is conspiring against them and their age gives them validation and thus, automatically, – respect. Ego is acting up as insecurities are taking over that sense of thinking objectively, every side of the story is ignored but the focus remains where self validated stories stick to perceptions and enough for turning everything into either a rosy-picture or a battle (depending on individual agency).

Ego. The harsh truth of life is that no one wants to be friends with an egoistic person. Initially they might seem to be someone we would put our hand in the fire for, but as you notice the growth (particularly power drive and ego) – it turns out that fire will burn you to ashes, and being brave and naive will only get you that far.

An egoistic person does not like being told if they’re wrong and always tend to take feedback a little too seriously and personally. Dealing with them is stressful, and no one wants added stress in their lives. Now, another thing that ego neglects is – respect which is to be earned, not demanded. And as I observed I realised how some would actually purposely kill their success due to “too much ego”.

It is fascinating how much I got to observe as I remained that steady constant in a versatile environment – I don’t have any urge to disrupt people and start speaking, nor prove my point and fight all the time. This keeps me calm and grounded; so just being seated there listening, is a huge way of knowing a great deal about what’s going on, and around, and also for self reflection. Too much ego makes us stubborn. We don’t want to listen to anyone or ask for advice. It stops us from asking for help from people who might know better than us.

Ego does us so much harm when in a massive dose! But that’s the thing though… our generation is an egotistical one. Including – I. And thus my dilemma over England vs. Italy. Who do I support? My namesake country or one where my forefathers and I received our education from? Ego love. That’s what comes to my mind. “I love you as long as I get something from you.”

Sigh.

Pardon my bad Latin but… Cogito, ergo sum – confusus.

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